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About Gregor

My approach

My approach is rooted in evidence-based methods and practices. I integrate elements from Acceptance & Commitment Therapy (ACT), Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP), and the St. Gallen Coaching Model (SCM) to accelerate individual transformation.

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Creating change that lasts

Often, when we struggle to solve our problems, reach our goals, or build the life we truly want, it’s not due to a lack of effort. It’s that we’re working only on the visible symptoms or events and not on the underlying causes of a problem.

The Iceberg Model illustrates this perfectly. At first glance, we tend to focus only on the surface - specific events that happen to us. But just like an iceberg, most of the "issue" remains hidden beneath the surface.

In my approach, we examine the hidden factors that contribute to a problem (patterns, structures, mental models), allowing for more effective solutions to be developed that address the root causes of the problem.

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Example of the iceberg approach in practice

Imagine waking up every morning feeling unmotivated and disconnected from your work. Your job feels meaningless, and getting out of bed becomes increasingly difficult. This is the event: the visible part of the iceberg.

If you take a closer look, you might notice this isn’t an isolated incident. A pattern emerges: you tend to choose the safest roles at work, avoiding risks and challenges. This pattern isn’t limited to your career; you see it in your relationships and personal life as well. You often stay in your comfort zone, avoiding uncertainty and emotional vulnerability.

Diving deeper, you begin to analyze the systemic structures influencing your choices. You realize that your workplace is highly risk-averse, operating with rigid rules and little room for innovation. But then you ask yourself: Why did I choose this environment in the first place? The answer becomes clear - you were unconsciously drawn to it because it provides a sense of security.

Now you reach the deepest level - your mental model. Growing up in a household with little love and emotional support, where criticism was common and praise was rare, you internalized a belief: "I am not good enough." This belief creates a deep-seated fear of failure and rejection, leading you to seek out environments that feel safe but limit your growth. The need for security has unconsciously shaped your life choices, keeping you in a cycle of avoidance. The result? A job you hate and a reluctance to form meaningful relationships (because vulnerability carries the risk of being hurt).

To truly change, it’s not enough to focus on surface-level solutions like switching jobs or forcing yourself to be more outgoing. The real transformation happens when we address our mental models and structures. That is what Carl Jung meant when he said until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life, and you will call it fate. By becoming aware of the hidden forces of our unconscious program, we can start to rewrite our story

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© 2024 by Francesca Valentini

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